Film Micrœview #435: Battleship

07.02.2018 § Leave a comment

Rating: Evil.

Had I known this was directed by the same guy who did The Kingdom, I wouldn’t have agreed to watch it. This too was jingoist, but this time instead of directly Islamophobically, it sets up a fantasy as a commercial for the armed forces to distract from the truth of our racist, imperialistic wars. It’s unfortunate, because the casting of real veterans, both amputees and octogenarians, was a compelling move and could have been cool in a slightly different context. But when the non-actors are out-acting your professional models, not good. That this director is also an actor makes his actor-direction even worse. There were scenes where I couldn’t believe a single line and it was like talking heads in some Brechtian nightmare.

Double-reverse shot?

Twice did the “motherf-” trick?

Visible radio communications?

Green/red and sound-effect alien vision?

Rhianna gets her own soccer outfit?

Pan past no-ass girl’s ass into space?

Horrible CG?

Main character is described as smart but never demonstrated as such?

Seriously though, just unconscionably bad acting?

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